Confused? Me too baby.
Alright, that was my cutesy way of saying, when one wants to blog, one must actually, BLOG. Consistently. On A Regular Basis. (At least once a week).
Clearly I have not done that, and
shame on me. Well, heaping shame on myself is silly and not productive. Part of what I speak about in this whole Sanity Search is to be pretty damn forgiving of yourself, when you’re going through times of crisis and chaos. Shame is not cool. However, sometimes we have to give ourselves a lecture, degree of sternness is variable. I needed to get stern. There was really no reason for me to not blog for so long. Was the last time really June?
You realize, as I do, that cutting ourselves slack and forgiveness must mesh with productivity. There has to be a reconciliation of oh-so-important relaxation and internal growth with getting stuff done. Of course! Laundry has to get done eventually, and even occasionally feeding of the family, or dusting a bookcase, making appointments, paying bills, getting cars repaired…the endless parade of productivity. And if you throw in earning money? It’s crazy-making, but it’s reality.
So yesterday, several things hit me at once, including but not limited to: A horrible headache, worry about one of the boys, worry about money, stress-in-general, etc. There were tears. There was thoughts of “I’m a failure!” Not fun, not pretty, but maybe necessary. Now I’m not saying that those negative affirmations about being a failure are necessary – there’s got to be a better way, yes? Of course.
I guess the best way to sum up is: When life gets shitty, you need to take time for yourself. You can rely on your faith, your friends, meditation, a good book, etc. But eventually, you might feel overwhelmed with what waits for you on your to-do list. Promise yourself that you will accomplish SOMETHING off that list, and then promise yourself you’ll do it again the next day, rinse and repeat. I’ve always noticed that taking action, even if it’s small, opens up a space inside you that releases energy and hope.
But surely, if you want to run a blog that gets read, you’ve got to WRITE! There’s always time to do what you enjoy, and if you profess to enjoy it like I do, the time and opportunity will show up.
So, regarding any negative self-talk, or beating yourself up, Don’t Do What I Do! But if you want to make a little progress, and snowball that into more progress – Do What I Did!